Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
