I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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