sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
