why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
did you just send me my own nude
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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