the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
