I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
