dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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