New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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