dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
