i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
only you would photoshop your dick
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Your cock deserves a montage
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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