My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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