Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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