Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize