belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
