LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
