Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
