Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Drunk is not a location!
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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