I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Randomize
