there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize