last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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