I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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