I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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