I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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