She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
