I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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