i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
