Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
