Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
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