You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
