do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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