I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize