so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
