What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
