Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
