I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
