watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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