North Korea, Best Korea!
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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