So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
