So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
