How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
