the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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