Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I just found puke in my bra..
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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