Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
