Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
