Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
