they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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