Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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