you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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