About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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