Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
