I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
